of my hip surgery.

The pain has increased significantly and I’m so very grateful to have surgery as an option. I’ve always been so independent and active.

I know when ever Life Lessons are ignored, they always come back around in some shape or form.

My stubborn independence and difficulty being vulnerable is fueling this particular repeat Life Lesson. My facade of bravery is just that, a facade. I’m painfully aware that much of my anxiety stems from fear; fear of being totally and completely dependent on others. Such a hard lesson for me that keeps coming back time and time again.

Today is the 4th Sunday of Advent; I love Advent.

This year, Matt is attending a Christmas party and my dear Ryan just finds it hard to engage in this family ritual when it’s just the two of us.

Alas the cycle of Life.

Here’s our beautiful Advent wreath with presents and tree in the background. I tried to get as much done as I could before going to the hospital tomorrow. Still have one gift on it’s way but generally, Christmas 2011 is ready for us.